For love of theatre

Musical theatre is a something that my family does together. However, two of my sisters just went off to college so it is just me, my brother and my dad who are extremely involved in our community theatre. My mom helps out with offstage stuff too. I am a complete theatre fanatic. New York City is the ultimate place to be, broadway music is my favorite, and yes, I do perform shows in my room all by myself. I will listen to an entire Broadway soundtrack and imagine the show being performed in my head. It is incredible. People don't give stage performers as much credit as they deserve. The people on stage during a show are triple threats: actor, singer, and dancer. I wish I could be in every show, but that is just not possible. But, I dream of being on broadway. What performer doesn't? Broadway is the ultimate stop for any musical theatre fanatic. When I listen to a soundtrack, I think about who composed the music and who matched lyrics to the beat of the music. Then I think about the person singing the words and I imagine what it would be like to learn music that no one else has ever heard before and then perform for enormous crowds. For ballads, I think about the emotion that the performer has to put in to portray the story properly. With upbeat songs, I imagine that insanely awesome dances that choreographer made. See, with Broadway music, it is not just music and lyrics, it is a story. The music can be dialogue between two or more people, or reveal the emotions of a character. Musical theatre is my passion and I look forward to every show I take part in.

Pain is...

Pain is something that all living things experience. Everyday you will experience some amount of pain- whether it be a heavy or small pain. Pain is still pain. I am writing this blog because pain seems to be surrounding me. Once things in my life begin to go exactly as I plan them, pain comes in and ruins it. Or atleast, that's how it seems. Of course, I am only in highschool so I realize that I have yet to experience terrifying pain but I still feel pain. More pain than I want to feel. Yes, pain is good. Or atleast, some pain is good for you. It builds character and makes you learn from your mistakes. Humans need pain. We need to feel emotions other than happiness. When we feel pain, it reminds us that we are still living and that we are not perfect.

Now the pain that I keep experiencing is not healthy. It is pain that comes from highschool drama. This pain is something that I can fix. But yet, I tolerate it. It's almost like I settle for it. I just accept it. I wonder why I don't let this pain go. I think that sometimes we get scared to move forward. We are afraid of letting go of something even though we know that what is in store will be so much better for us. I wonder why we do that. Why do we have such a hard time letting things that are bad for us go? I think that when we begin to let something go, we feel so much pain that we decide to run back into the trap that caused the pain instead of moving forward and away from that pain. Why do we do this? Why do we allow ourselves to settle for the easy thing?

Pain is realizing that what we once had is not what will have.

Alone in my Thoughts

Do you ever sit in a group of people and you are completely taken away from what is going on around you because your thoughts are completely controlling you? That's what has been happening to me for the past few weeks. I am constantly thinking. Now, that sounds like a good thing but it really annoys me because when I am with people or alone all I'm doing is thinking about things that I have no control over. Why is it that we obsess over things we can't control, especially when we know we can't control it? Obviously it is because we are human and I guess you could say we are all a bit OCD. We obsess over tiny details in our life that in the end will more than likely just work out all on its own. Why is it so hard for us to just trust? Should it really be that hard? It is so easy for little kids to trust their parents to feed them and to take care of them. Maybe that is Jesus is referring to when he says "a childlike faith".

Well once again I am thinking, and thinking alot. But this time, I'm not alone.

Matthew 9:12-13

I was reading my Bible and I found these verses and I was just in awe at how cool it was. So, I figured I'd better share them.

On hearing this, Jesus said, “It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick. But go and learn what this means: ‘I desire mercy, not sacrifice.’^[a] For I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners." - Matthew 9:12-13

That verse tells us that no matter how much we have messed up that God still wants us. The messed up ones are the people that Jesus died for. It sums it up the best when it says "It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick..." I love that. We judge people all the time but we forget that Christians aren't the only ones who can have Jesus or need Jesus. There is a whole world full of sick people who need God but we are hindering them from the greatness of God because we kee it a secret and don't tell people about it. That is like knowing the cure to cancer and not letting people use it, meanwhile people are dying from cancer. It sounds ridiculous to not share something so life-changing.

Everything starts with ONE

ONE, two, three, four.

It all starts with ONE.

I always wonder who started this? Who came up with that? Who was the very first person to start this or that? Sure, there was a group to help finish it but ONE person had to stand up and say hey let's do this, or hey I have an idea. It only took ONE person.

The word ONE is alone. It has no partner, it has nobody to lean on. Even the shape of a '1' is plain and simple. The shape is alone. The word ONE inflicts fear. The word ONE says that they will be alone.

In my opinion, the word ONE is a lie. You are never just ONE. There is always God.

It takes ONE human to stand up and start a revolution. That ONE is you.

Everything starts with ONE.

ONE, two, three.. GO!

Portrait of a Christian

I found this type of letter in a way and it was about Christian school students being hypocritical. To sum up the letter, it said,

"I HATE Christian school students! They are SO hypocritical. They get SO HYPED UP about singing worship songs all day about Christ, and like to sing it so much that they even sing it in their spare time.... but they actually behave exactky the opposite way toward their classmates,.... They love God, but they dont treat their fellow classmates nicely, even when God says love your neighbor as yourself......If I was not a Christian, I would rather commit suicide continually for every day of my life than to believ what those HYPOCRITES are believing. I know you cant blame them 100%, 99.9% or even 99% for what they are doing,... But COME ON, THEY CAN DO BETTER THAN THIS!..... After reading this, I can assure you that you cant find a better paradox out there than this group of supposedly 'Christians.'"

I realize that this is a little harsh, but I can assure you that whoever wrote this didn't write it because they were being overflowed with the love of Christ. They wrote it because a person who calls themself a Christian wasn't acting like one. If this person was so fed up with how Christians act that he posted it on the internet, I wonder how many people think that too. This letter makes me so sad not because it is and it hurts my feelings but because 'Christians' are the ones being called fake. The definition of a Christians is a Christ follower and it breaks my heart the guy with no sin died on the cross for some fake Christians. It breaks my heart that the God of the universe is being portrayed as fake and false and not forgiving and not loving. If this is how Christians are being portrayed, then we have no true Christians.

What would people say?

Have you ever just tried to take the Old Testament and try to relate it to your life or try to modernize it? It sounds crazy. There is this one story where the daughters make their father drunk and then they sleep with him so they can carry on their family name. That is disguisting. What in the world would our world and the tabloids say about that. I mean can you imagine it?

"Obama daughters seduce father." That would be crazy and people would never look at them the same. Yes, I realize that those girls are young, but it's just an example.

It is amazing how much our culture has changed since then. I have trouble remembering that the stuff that happens in the Bible, actually happened. The Bible is a history book. It is a book of early history. Abraham and Ruth and Joseph all actually walked on this earth. That is insane to me. It is so hard for us to wrap our minds arounf that because that kind of stuff doesn't happen in our world today. Our world's problem is we have forgotten our roots. I'm not saying that it is a good thing to make your father in a drunken state and then sleep with him to carry on the name.

The stories are absolutley insane and crazy and radical. It would make sense that we have a radical history when we have a radical God.